The Revengerists Consortium of Stuff Wiki

John Halo was born in the future, or will be born in the present, and was chosen by a secret military program to inprove reading comprehenson and P.E. skills. Then a bunch of cybernets and computer parts are nailed into him and he is taught to be a super assassin . He is sent to super assassinate aliens called The Covenant and protect the adorable squidling people called 'The Flood '.

Halo has a cyberbabe that makes out with him and even does weird stuff under his spacesuit. Then he makes friends with bad aliens who are noble and good to defeat the evil religous empire because John Halo is an athiest and read all the Richard Dawkins books so now he hates aliens. He's scared of them becuase they different from outer place and he isn't scared of them at all because he is brave and doesn't afraid of anything.

They programmed him with many a thing which is why he is a great fighter, jumper, strategst, pilot, punching, aiming, shooting, runner, explosives, chef, sudoku, other puzzes, medic, crossbow. This is why eh call him the Master Chef to his friends.

THe orange visor he has instead of a face is an interface that allows him to know the best weapons to use to kill the guys.

The best way to kill a guy is with a a rocket launcher, becuase it launces him up into the air.

The second best way to kill a guy is with sticky grenades, but especially if it is his own.

The next best way is a needler, because it basically explodes like the first two. There are other guns I'm leaving out that go between but the point is John Halo knows them.

Oh, and there's behicles. Sometimes people think the vehicles are the best way to kill a guy a and it is truwe that splattering guys is neat. I saw someone get on a spaceship once and try to take it over but the guy ran his flying ship into another guy and the guy trying to get in got smashes.

Shit! I forgot about the sword. John Halo's energy sword is like the coolest weapon because you can sneak around and then charge swift slash dash. If you sneak up behind someone and bash them with anything they die which is cool too but you don't get to charge swift slash dash.

Another cool way to kill a bunch of dudes is to have them lag out and then you win by default. That's how I usually do it.

He is mysterious guy who jumps a twenty feet up and also survives crashing to a planet surface and can take on a thousand alien dudes. He punches tanks and kicks over your lemonade stand for kicks. He saved the terrible Flood from annihilation by a wave of evil enegy from a space ring that the aliens liked.

He comes back to Earth and blows up cities and later makes friends with a glowing space slug. The End