"My Favorite Christmas Memory is a one time issue of the RThe Revengerists Comic Series and also my favorite christmas memory, which is also the only christmas memory I have."
One Christmas day in past times, the Revengerists were sitting around the fireplace. They were dediciding who was the least deserving of all the people in the world and couldn't make up their minds. In order to solve this mystery , they discussed many topics including: war, religion, culture, food, art, clothing, most common grammatical errors in written text, stupid trends that annoy them, celebrity worship, the general american mindset and why citizens of the United States of America should fucking die in a fire, animals, environment issues, and The Cosby Show.
The Debate[]
During each topic of conversation, the good guys debated ways to change, fix, or delete any issues involved. However their discussion was interrupted by none other than an Intern who wouldn't SHUT THE FUCK UP about the following story:
"I remember when I was a little boy and i was spending time with my family. We had a yearly tradition where we would eat dinner composed of a number of items and then sing christmas carols by the fireplace. After the carols we would watch Christmas movies and go to sleep after the movies. We would open presents the next morning. One particular year we had the entire village in one place and we all put our heads together to do some realy good on Christmas day. It all started when-"
And at that point some kind of Awesome took the Intern by the testicles and threw him into the earth's atmosphere. All seemed back to normal when suddenly bad guys attacked them! OH NO! It turns out the intern landed in an evil compound and it angered him. Well they soundly defeated him since he was the only one there, but there was a plot behind this! The Southside Santa was dealing with some shady dealers in some part of the world and the Revengerists needed to STOP HIM! So they went to the library and logged into Facebook. The reality they saw shocked them...people were not stopping from talking about their favorite christmas memories. Every single self absorbed motherfucker on that website was posting uninteresting novels and pictures about their memories. Not one Revengerist cared about the memories, not a single one had any interest in those boring stories from entitled, snooty fuck-wits. It was the same as anything else: the instagramed photos of stupid looking hipster food, "memes" about their uninformed opinions, or shitty "widsoms." The worst part in their minds was that each person thought that people cared; that Facebook was their own stupid, backwards universe where they were the earth and the rest of the galaxy revolved around them.
They became furious, swinging their arms around like mad apes. "We must stop this!" they exclaimed! Thus began their quest to destroy social networking once and for all. They selected a group of the finest warriors and sent them to the land of the Internet, where they would obtain the ancient relic that powers the Social Network. Afterward they would come upon the gates of the dark country where the Internet was created and place it upon the altar of the creator and smash the relic with the great hammer of justice.
Upon completion of their quest they would receive a year's supply of Cheez-whiz, the home version of their quest, and if they got first place they would also receive a BRAND NEW CAR! Unfortunately Hotknife rolled a 1 and it turns out that no one felt like going on a quest, so they all just chilled out and ordered a pizza. The delivery driver was really passive-aggressive about working during a holiday, so no one tipped him and told him to go home. The pizza was not very hot and they put too many peperonis on one half of it. Someone almost called the pizza a "pie" but shut their mouth at the last second as to not get eviscerated.
In the end they decided that no one deserved anything good and that everyone should all die in a fire.
BackGround[]
The appendices of Revengerists Issue #45 explain that Christhéoden was the only son of Police Chief Bangel and Morwo (a region of Fondor). He was the second-born of five children, and the only boy. Christhéoden was closest to his youngest sister, Christhéodwyn. He was born in Fondor, where his family lived until Bengel became king of Gohan.
He became king after the death of his father. Christhhéodwyn lived with him in Gregoras. He married Palfhild, but she died giving birth to their son, Christhéodred. After Christhéodwyn and her husband Geomund also died, he adopted their children, Bomer and Bowyn.
In his prime, Christhéoden was a strong and vital policeman, highly respected by his subjects. As with other Ben of the Griddlermark, Christhhéoden was a skilled norseman.
He acted as the First Herchhal of the Dark after the death of Bomund, who had filled that position; as First Barshal he commanded the Buster of Boras (Christhéodred and Bomer were respectively the Second and Third Barshal). His sword was called Christherugrim.