The Great LEGO™ War was the conflict that resulted from the Great LEGO™Plot by villainous villains such as Mike Eisner and his international terrorist organization to monopolize the world's LEGO™supplies.

Sometime back a while ago, some evil mad genius mastermind decided to hoarde every single LEGO™ piece, first by buying those commercially available, then the garage sales of the world, then nefariously stealing toys from babies, and finally a full-on assault of LEGOLand™. With every LEGO™ owned, they could then destroy the surplus, flood or simply corner the market, sending the economies of the world into a new Dark Ages. (In addition, your fortress, swords, death ray guns, armor and henchmen helmets can be constructed from the brightly coloured plastic bricks.) No one is quite sure who in the social network of evil first came up with the plan, and it is hotly contested with theoretical forerunners including Eisner, the Red Skull , and Orville Redenbacher . What is known is that some boistrous and vainglorious supervillain just couldn't keep his trap shut about his fantastically devious scheme, and before you know it, there is a rush by all villains, not just the vengeance ones, to snap up every last brick. No easy task, as they were all undermining each other, and it eventually 'tricked down' to economists, greedy corporate bastards, and even Mr. Bad Society Man that the game was on. Once the entire 1% knew what was going on, there was no way they were going to continue to allow the top .01% to dishonestly gain and keep it all for themselves.

The plan at some point also involved giant lasers in space for some reason.

In issue #720, The Revengerists catch wind of this when they commence to check out their twitter (which they unofficially refer to as their personal "spy network") and discover all of the evil tweets of their most famous nemeses' plans for starting to begin to stock up on all LEGOs™. Posing as people who wouldn't kick your ass, they instead showed up and characteristically kicked every villains' ass, in what some tame-ass karate monday-morning quarterbacking live-in-their-parents'-basements armchair-historian internet trolls would refer to as... THE GREAT LEGO™WAR!

Ironically, the boom and bust initiated by the run on LEGO™shares did indeed result in worldwide economic chaos, but to no specific villain's credit or benefit, and albiet by the indirect influence LEGOs™had at that time on the unregulated housing market bubble and default credit swaps. This would be referred to by later historians as the sub-prime mortgage leading to the late-2000s financial crisis (often called the Global Recession, Global Financial Crisis or the Credit Crunch), considered by many economists to be the worst financial crisis since the Great Depression of the 1930s.[1]

But you don't believe all that, now do you?

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