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They Live

They Live Aliens are a strange race of sentient humanoid aliens. Despite their being infiltrated and outed in the late 80's, the name of their race or homeworld has never been revealed. The name is taken from a popular phrase of the resistance against They; "They Live While We Sleep."

Physiology[]

The aliens have a vaguely similar body structure to humans, enough that they can convincingly disguise themselves. However, they have blue skin, bulging eyes, and no lips.

They are not necessarily Awesomes, just have advanced technology, and can be killed with simple firearms. The bastards die just like we do.

History[]

Arrival[]

Obey

1988 Repiblican vice-presidential candidate Dan Quayle as seen through magic (polarized) sunglasses

At some point, these (possibly extradimensional) aliens arrived on Earth and attempted to take over the planet. However, rather than outright invade, they opted for a more subtle approach. The aliens managed to quietly teleport into a series of underground tunnels and take advantage of a television broadcasting station, designing the satellite dish to broadcast false signals that affected human senses on a subliminal level, specifically covering subliminal messages such as "mate and reproduce" and "sleep" hidden in seemingly ordinary places such as billboards, posters, and magazines, all of this meant to keep humanity subdued for their benefit.

Discovery[]

At some unknown point, a small group of humans began to figure out that things were not what they seemed to be. They began to form together, creating small resistance groups which hoped to figure out a way to expose the alien presence to the world. To see the world for what it really was, they managed to develop a pair of magic (polarized) sunglasses which were immune to the affects of the broadcasts, allowing people to see the true faces of the aliens and the hidden subliminal messages.

Exposure[]

A drifter (unemployed professional wrestler Rowdy Roddy Piper) stumbled across the aftermath of a resistance group after a meeting was split up by the aliens. He managed to find a box of the sunglasses and decided to start trying to fight the aliens himself. After some exploration, he managed to gain support from another construction worker, and eventually join up with a resistance group. Unfortunately, the meeting was inturrupted by a group of aliens, and in the process many of the people involved were killed.

However, the drifter survived and using stolen technology managed to infiltrate their hideout, working their way to the roof of the broadcasting station. He was killed by aliens disguised as police, but not before shooting and destroying the device that was broadcasting the messages, causing both the subliminal messages and the true faces of the alien to become visible ot the general public. Their fate afterwards is unknown.

Sell

SELL MAKE BOOKS.

Many of They in disguise managed to remain powerful figures in key positions of business, politics, the media, and the military-industrial complex. These include:

  • South Carolina Senator Lindsey Graham
  • crooked former A&P and Borders books CEO Ron Marshall
  • Chicago mayor Rahm Emanuel
  • radio and television pundit Willie Cunningham
  • FOX News president Roger Ailes
  • Baseball commisioner Bud Selig
  • James Trafficante
  • JP Morgan Chase executive Jamie Diamond
  • Israel's right-wing prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu (who once called Yitzhak Rabin a nazi before his assassination by right-wingers)
  • commentator and professional sell-out Michelle Malkin
  • former Connecticut Senator Joe Lieberman
  • Facebook "founder" Mark Zuckerman
  • Lyndon LaRouche
  • Infomercial King, convicted fraudster con artist Kevin Trudeau
  • former Cincinnati Reds manager and owner Marge Schott (deceased)
  • former Sallie Mae CEO and evil supervillain Albert Lord
  • advisors and generals working for and with Russian president Vladmir Putin (but not Putin himself)
  • simpleton writer, hate-monger, racist, classist, and renowned horseface Anne Coulter
  • Joan Rivers, who is barely passing (deceased)

Be very wary of propaganda or messaging you see in the media or from so-called 'elected' officials, as many of these have been later proven to be attempts (or successes) at brainwashing from They:

  • Buy and consume (following 9/11)
    Conform

    a single square block in downtown Pittsburgh (it looks even worse through the glasses)

  • Be afraid of Muslims
  • They're coming to take your guns
  • Support Death Culture
  • Support Rape Culture
  • Do not unionize
  • Watch the Kardashians
  • Support war in Afghanistan
  • Support war in Iraq
  • Support war in Syria (they don't always take)
  • Accrue college debt
  • Shoot your neighbors
  • Buy and consume (following the economic crash)
  • Pay attention to sex scandals
  • Listen to Bieber
  • Drink six liters of soda a day
  • Work for minimum wage
  • Stay in your cubicle
  • Shut up
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